(Authors note: As I read this blog post a decade later (2023) and having grown in my understanding of how oppression desecrates the image of God in both the oppressor and the victim, I want to clarify that there are times to leave an oppressive relationship. There are Biblical examples of people fleeing for safety and it is consistent with the law of love to leave an abusive marriage or church. We are not called to suffer for suffering’s sake and seeking God’s glory may mean seeking safety and calling an oppressor to repentance. The gospel frees us to be fearless, free, and controlled by the Holy Spirit alone.)
If you are enduring a broken or miserable relationship, Jesus Christ can give you the freedom and grace you need to suffer for Him. Peter, did you just say freedom to suffer? Yes, I did. Freedom to suffer… and suffer with joy too!
Freedom has been on my mind recently, perhaps because of the recent elections in Virginia and my growing awareness of the importance of standing up for our religious liberties. But as I consider the freedom Christians have in Christ, I realize that while certain liberties can be taken away from us by politicians, there is a freedom that Christians have that cannot be taken away. And it is a freedom we can exercise in a tough relationship, while in prison, or when confronted by someone we would rather hate or run from.
Christians are free in Christ. Galatians 5:1 says: “For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.” At the 2013 Peacemaker Conference, Dale Pyne reminded us that Christian freedom was threefold: freedom from slavery to sin, freedom for the purpose of love, in order to serve others. (A summary of Dale’s Keynote Address can be found here.)
Contrary to our natural first impressions, freedom may not be found in leaving a church or abandoning a relationship. In some cases, freedom may not even be found in running from real enemies. Consider Dietrich Bonhoeffer, a pastor and theologian who was murdered by the Nazi’s for standing against injustice. Bonhoeffer recognized the evil that was taking place in Germany and refused to take the easy way out. At one point in his life, Bonhoeffer had escaped to America, but realized he was called by God to return to Germany to share in his people’s trials. By God’s grace, he refused to take the easy way out. And by God’s grace, Bonhoeffer remained faithful until his martyrdom.
“For it is better to suffer for doing good, if that be God’s will, than for doing evil.” – 1 Peter 3:17.
Are you ready to give up on a relationship in your family or thinking about leaving your church? Consider that the freedom you seek may be a mirage, an idol offering a false promise of freedom, which ultimately will disappoint you in the end. An idol is anything other than God (the true God with a big G) that you worship, by looking to it to deliver you and give you freedom.
What are you hoping for to deliver you from your painful circumstances? Is it a new spouse or relationship, the absence of a painful relationship or conflict, a better job or more money? The problem is that we seek freedom in the wrong places. Make no mistake – our idols will not deliver. Abandoning a relationship or starting a new relationship may not give you the freedom you are seeking. Our idols are slave masters, masquerading as abolitionists.
The temptation of Christians in America is to use our freedom to avoid suffering at all costs. But the escape we are looking for is not always the way of the Master. Consider what our lives would be like if Jesus had used His freedom to avoid suffering and dying on the cross for our sins.
True freedom is found in having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, the great abolitionist. It is found in knowing that Christ died for our sins and in turning from our sins to follow Him. It is found in worshipping at the foot of the cross. Christ calls us to die to ourselves, pick up his cross and follow Him. In the gospel, Christ frees us to love our neighbor and follow His law, the law of liberty (James 1:25).
The truth is, you can’t endure your painful relationships on your own. You can’t endure suffering in your own power. The chains of sin and self-love must be broken by Christ our deliverer. Only when Christ has set you free will you have the power to love others and endure your situation.
“Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.” – 2 Corinthians 3:17.
Only by encountering Christ will you be liberated to love others and face the future without fear. If you are not a Christian, will you ask Christ to set you free today? If you already are a follower of Christ, will you join me in exercising your freedom in Christ and embrace suffering for His name?
There is great freedom in knowing that your relationships provide you with opportunities to grow to be like Christ, love others, and glorify God. Let us love and serve the one who has set us free.
photo credit: empirical_perception via photopin cc
