Darby Strickland’s main session included an invitation to vulnerability. Scripture calls us to lean into God and fellow believers in seasons of deep anguish. It is not good for us to be alone. But vulnerability requires opening up oneself to another and that can be scary. For those who have been traumatized, there may be a temptation towards relational hypervigilance. But relational hypervigilance can hinder us from healing and flourishing.
What is relational hypervigilance? When someone hurts us, it leaves a mark. Being hurt gives us wisdom for life. We learn to discern if those around us are deceptive or dangerous. Vigilance means that we are ready to protect ourselves. Sometimes this is a gift. But its over calibration is harmful. Relational hypervigilance brings our past experiences to the present when circumstances surrounding the trauma are long over. We may fear abandonment or rejection or being hurt again. “Some trauma victims extrapolate that the whole world is unsafe and unpredictable.” Darby invites us to know a trustworthy God.
Terror on every side. Darby challenged us to recognize that abuse sufferers actually live with terror on every side. “Countless nets are cast on abuse victims. We should work painstakingly to free them.” To love the oppressed well, we help them find safety. Darby looked at Psalm 31, showing how David encountered God in his sufferings. David knew how to run for his life, both from King Saul and the Philistines. We can not overestimate the evil and horror David faced. There is terror on every side. Everywhere David moves, there is devastation and threat. Simple and ordinary things are laced with danger. These are the times we must fight to see who the Lord is.
“There is something to see, something more significant than the reality of terror on every side: a God who loves us and is more protective and powerful than any scary thing.” – Darby Strickland
Hope breaks in. “We are weak and we need rescue and one way God rescues us is to help us see him so that our confidence is renewed.” David begins to see God clearly, declaring: you are my rock and fortress, you lead me and guide me, you are my refuge, you have redeemed me, you have seen my affliction and known my enemies, you have not delivered me to my enemy, you have set my feet in a broad place, you shelter your children, you heard the voice of my cries, you have preserved me. Darby reminded us that God alone was on David’s side and that advantage proved more than enough.
What might we ask of God if we understood that our distress was a reason for him to act? David understands that his problem is God’s problem. He knows that his distress is a reason for God to act. He implores God to act. David requests: Let me never be put to shame, rescue me speedily, be a rock of refuge for me, be gracious to me, rescue me, make your face shine upon me, save me in your steadfast love, let the wicked be out to shame and let them go silent to sheol, let the lying lips be mute. David prays: “Take me out of the net they have hidden for me, for you are my refuge.”
David’s boldness is born out of intimacy with God. “David remembers God’s faithful redeeming love and therefore he trusts his very vulnerable self to God.”
Loving other by being ambassadors. How do we love trauma victims well? We need to be patient with trauma victims and tenderly hold out God’s faithfulness to them. “People will learn about the Lord via our character. Our tangible presence.” Sufferers will learn about the patience of the Lord as we are patient and grieve with them. It is ok if they don’t see God clearly yet. We can comfort others and be comforted ourselves because we know that God is always revealing his love. Psalm 31:21.
“As God’s ambassadors we want to understand their experience fully so that we can meet them with Scripture that echoes and validates their experience of suffering. This helps them see God’s heart for them.” – Darby Strickland
As Christ’s ambassadors we are delighted when God gifts the oppressed the ability to see himself anew.
“If Jesus is pleased to die and rescue us from our sins, how much more delight does he take in rescuing us from the sins of others and the brokenness of this world.” – Darby Strickland
